Written by Tracey Stern, Directed by David Straiton

Guest starring Kristin Dattilo as Harry, Carlos Jacott as Richard Straley

Co-starring Ted Kairys as Ben, Chris Tallman as Nick, Brad Blaisdell as Uncle John, Robert Hillis as Pierce, Lauri Johnson as Aunt Martha, Kristen Lowman as Mother Rachel, David Polcyn as Russ

"If I'm not here in the morning, you can just clear out my desk. I'll be moving on up." -Cordelia

"You were so... brave." -Cordelia
"You think you can say that again without so much shock in your voice? You're steppin' on my moment of manliness here." -Doyle
"I'm sorry. I'm just so..." -Cordelia
"...surprised?" -Doyle
"Grateful." -Cordelia

"He was really beat up, but you know the first thing asked? 'Are you okay?' I mean, that's like, substance, right?" -Cordelia

"I'd rather be dead than date a fixer-upper again." -Cordelia

"Can I get a side of bland with that bland?" -Doyle

"You were kids, it's only natural." -Angel
"To sneeze and sprout demon face? That's decidedly unnatural." -Doyle

"She's gonna sprout hub caps from her head or something." -Doyle

"You're the first girl in town I've met under 370 years old." -Harry

"Doyle taught third grade? The kind with children?" -Cordelia
"Well, yeah." -Harry
"Are you sure he wasn't just held back and used that as a cover story?" -Cordelia

"Where are you?" -Angel
"In the nether-world known as the 818 area code." -Cordelia

"You're a good half-man." -Richard to Doyle

"Nick, what's this?" -Uncle John
"You said get a utensil." -Nick
"This is a shrimp fork. He's gonna eat the guy's brains with a shrimp fork?" -Uncle John
"Well, pardon me if our ancient ancestors didn't leave behind any former-husband-brain-eating forks." -Nick
"Get a soup spoon, you moron!" -Uncle John

"You brought a vampire to my brother's bachelor party?" -Nick

"Who wants a wife whose knees only bend in one way?" -Nick

"Someone has to go out there and cheer him up." (Angel starts to go) "Oh please, someone with a heart beat." -Cordelia

"Nice guys don't always finish last." -Cordelia
"You think I'm a nice guy?" -Doyle
"I think it, I say it. It's my way." -Cordelia